Forever isn't Eternity
by AriusChambers
Summary: Hinamori Amu is a 17-year-old senior in High School. Her life crumbles when Hotori Tadase becomes more aggressive with her by becoming an abusive "boyfriend". So what happens when Tsukiyomi Ikuto comes back into her life after so many years as her Music teacher in her school? Read well, and find out! Amuto
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

I finally made it to my final year in High School. I, a senior of 17 years of age, have finally reached my final year being tied down by the little King known as Hitori Tadase-kun. My elementary crush who I have lost interest since I started Junior High so many years before, right after... Ikuto left...

Not seeing him for so long was difficult. I get occasional texts from him here and there, telling me how his music tour around the world is going with the orchestra, and how much he misses me. But the texting stopped 2 years ago. I usually wasn't the one who texted him, but I got concerned. I never got a reply. I assumed that he might have moved on with someone he met during his travels.

I have told Tadase about it, and he seemed more worried about me. He took the advantage of me grieving over Ikuto by trying to get me to fall in love with him again. He started saying those three little words again after so long of not hearing it... "I love you..." but I never said them back. I was afraid to be drawn back into the mistake I made a long time ago.

I pretend to smile when I'm with Tadase-kun, pretending to be his little girlfriend until I graduate and leave him forever. I try to fake blush a bit whenever he blurts out those words again and whenever he touches me. But I never mean it. I would never fall for him again.

Or so I thought...

It was coming close to a major exam that was 3 weeks before summer break and I needed to study like hell if I wanted to graduate by the end of the year. Tadase-kun invited me to his place for some studying. I didn't want to go, but I realized that he wasn't gonna try anything because he's too sweet and innocent to try anything.

Summer vacation was soon, but the heat was already here. I could hear the cicadas buzzing everywhere. Getting to Tadase-kun's place wasn't difficult at least. It was just as big as I remembered since the last time I was here, which felt like a thousand years ago...

We couldn't study in his room because it was too small, so we took over the living room.

"Do you want some Tea Amu-chan?" he asked.

"Um...sure..." I hesitated for a moment because I wasn't paying attention.

After he brought some tea and cookies, we started studying. We sat down by the table on the floor. he was at least 90 degrees away from me. It didn't take me long to realize that we were the only ones here. I couldn't hold back my curiosity.

"Where is your family?" I asked.

"Father is working, and mother is with grandmother shopping..." he didn't take his eyes off from his notes.

"Oh..." I was hoping for some supervision...

Not even 20mins into our silent studying, I was already having trouble with some of my math. It was one of my hardest subjects to deal with in school.

"Something wrong?" he asked.

I jumped a little since I was so deep in thought about the problem that I forgot that he was there. Plus he broke the silence and hearing him all of a sudden scared me.

"...Uh... I'm just having trouble with this problem." I pointed where I was having trouble. He leaned closer to me to get a better view.

"Ah yes... You just do this annnnd...there. Do you get it now?"

"Oh wow! Now I do! Thanks."

I didn't realize how happy I was, because I ended up hugging him real hard. He seemed hesitant when I did it too, but he hugged me back. Then I noticed that he wasn't letting me go.

"Um... Tadase-kun? You can let go of me now..." but he didn't.

I tried to push him off but he was surprisingly strong. Then I see his face below my chest staring at me. I looked so desperate, but he also looked like he wanted something... Then he looked at my chest.

"...I never realized how much bigger these got..." he blurted.

"Huh?" and before I knew it, he buried his face into my boobs.

He was moving his head back and forth in a 180 degree stroke. His nose, brushing against my breast, and his hair was tickling my chest. I think they called it motor boating... I couldn't help but let out a small moan from the sensitivity.

"Amu-chan... I love you... I want you..."

"Why are you doing this?! This isn't you!" I screamed from the minor pleasure.

He stopped moving his head and placed one hand on one of my boobs while the other hand was still locked around me, and proceeded by squeezing my boob hard. I let out a loud moan. I tried covering my mouth, but I couldn't contain the noise.

"I can't help it... The drug...it's..." he responded.

"Drug?!" I questioned.

"Kukai-san...gave me a pill... Said that it would help me...become more of a man..." he was breathing fast, like he wouldn't to hold back anymore.

Kukai... Last I heard of him, he was in his rebellious phase where he had a certain kind of confidence, where it got him into trouble. He started going out with girls more after he dumped Utau because she was too busy with her career for him. And I think he did more than just 'going out' with those other girls... He musta felt bad for Tadase-kun when he couldn't become someone like Kukai, thinking he'll never have me unless he used force. Like Ikuto use to do... Was he trying to be like Ikuto? Tadase-kun was jealous of him for making the first move to kiss me...

Tadase-kun was starting to go crazy, like he was about to blackout and let his animal instincts take over. After about a few minutes of groping my chest, he took the bottom part of my shirt and lifted it over my boobs, revealing my bare abdomen. He unclipped my bra and started groping some more. I couldn't move. I was pinned to the floor at that point moaning from his strong delicate fingers all over my chest. It felt so much more different than when my shirt and bra were on. One of his knees made its way in between my legs. It was so sensitive there that I couldn't help but feel weird and good at the same time.

My body couldn't hold back. I wanted it to stop, but my body wanted more than this. My head was spinning from all the blood in my face. I felt embarrassed with him seeing my chest and hearing my embarrassing moans.

I could feel his lips wrap around my nipples, licking...sucking... It was painful a little, but it sent this nerve down in between my legs. I didn't know what to do. I tried thinking about how I was getting myself outta this. But it was hopeless... I was consumed by overwhelming pleasure and I couldn't control my emotions and my body.

I wrapped my arms around his frail body, clenching my fingers into his shirt. One of his hands found its way to my pussy. He lifted my skirt and started rubbing my pussy, back and forth, side to side, in and out. It was much harder to hold back at this point. He stopped for a moment and looked at me.

"Amu-chan... You're very...wet..." he said chuckling.

I let go of his non-masculine body and placed my hands over my face to hide from embarrassment. I couldn't believe that words such as those came out from his mouth. I didn't like this side of Tadase-kun's, but the fact that it's something that would come from Ikuto's mouth, made it more exciting. But Tadase-kun isn't Ikuto, I knew that. But it's been so long since I had the "bad-boy" feel all over me. It's a craving-a longing for such attention that I hate myself for developing.

"Look at me..." he whispered into my ear, sending chills down my spine.

I didn't move. But he did. I could hear what sound like a belt coming off and possibly something else coming off. Then he took both of my hands away from my face and pinned them to the floor, with my legs over his thighs. My eyes were still firmly closed, but my sense of feeling was making me curious. I could feel something warm, soft but rough, touching the outside part of my panties. It was touching such a sensitive part of me, where his fingers were before.

"Today...we are becoming adults...as one..." he said so proud.

I couldn't help my curiosity and looked at where the poking was. And there it was...his...penis... I never saw one before. I've only heard about it around high school and my parents when I matured. I never thought the first one I would see would be Tadase-kun's... I started to panic. I didn't want this! I wanted to scream!

"We're home!" someone called out from the front door.

It sounded like his mother. I could see Tadase-kun's face go pale and he immediately put his pants back on. I rush as well to look proper and I grabbed my things.

"Hey there sweetie." his mom greeting when she came into the room.

"H-hey mother..." his nose was in the textbook, pretending that nothing happened before. I took the chance to leave.

"Hinamori-san? Are you leaving? Aren't you suppose to study?" his mom asked.

"We did, and I was told by my mother to be home by lunch." I didn't look into her eyes because I was afraid that she might see that I'm lying.

"Oh...ok. Tell her I say hi and have a nice day." she bought it.

"I will, thank you." and then briskly left.

I didn't say bye to Tadase-kun. I didn't even wanna look at him after the things he did to me... I just wanted to go home and sleep...if I even can...


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Of course I couldn't sleep. My mind was repeating the events that happened between Tadase-kun and I over and over again like a broken record. I could still feel his touch, his lips all over my body again... I felt sick... It was something I haven't felt in a while. But I didn't like it like this. Tadase-kun was suppose to kind, caring, respectful. But he went much farther than what Ikuto could have done.

Ikuto... I wanted him to come back already... But I wasn't sure if he still wanted me... Should I bare with the possibly of a new Tadase-kun? Should I just move on and forget about Ikuto? I wasn't sure if I was ready to forget and move on... I just want to see him one last time until I know for sure.

It was another week starting in school. It was the same old smiles from familiar faces in my class. Everyone was chatting before class started in the morning, but it wasn't enough for me to stay awake. I get a poke on my head from someone in front of my desk.

"Amu-chan?" it was Nagihiko.

I mumbled a little and lifted my head to see him. Judging from his stunned expression, I believed that my face was hell.

"How bad do I look?" I asked him.

He took a moment, "...Pretty bad... Couldn't sleep?"

I nodded.

"Any reason why?"

"...Dunno..." I placed my head back into my arms to hide my face.

I couldn't tell Nagihiko what happened between me and Tadase-kun. Even though he's been my best friend since I joined the Guardians in Elementary school. But back then, he was a girl known as Nadeshiko. It was a shock when he told me before we graduated, before going into junior high. I was upset, but knowing I had my best friend beside me this whole entire time was great. I trusted him so much, but what happened with Tadase-kun and I shouldn't be told to anyone. I wanted to scream... I wanted to just go somewhere far away and scream.

The bell rang for class and everyone hurried to there seats when the teacher walked into class. I think I realized the most now that I'm glad that Tadase-kun isn't in my class, but he's still just next door. So I havta think of a plan on how I'm getting out of this class during breaks without seeing him today... Though it was kinda hard to think with me all sleepy and such.

I didn't even notice that the lunch break has already started. I was able to avoid Tadase-kun during the first break, so I had to do it and succeed again. I had to bolt out fast if I wanted to avoid Tadase-kun. But as soon as I opened the door to leave, Tadase-kun was already there waiting for me. I jumped for a second and then attempted to run, but he already had my arm and dragged me away.

"I need to talk to you alone." he said.

His voice sounded so angry. It was deeper than normal. His hand was hurting my arm so much, it was unbearable.

"Let go! You're hurting me!" I pleaded.

"No! You're gonna run away as soon as I let go!"

He took me all the way to the roof of the school and finally let go of my arm. It left a red hand mark around my wrist. I rubbed it like I just got tight handcuffs off after several hours of trying to get them off.

After he set me free, he briskly went for the door, placed a huge cinder block in front of the door. I gulped because he trapped me up here and I'm not that strong enough to lift the block. But I was surprised that he could...

"So..." I started, to ease the tension, "...what did you wanna talk about...?"

He looked at me with fierce eyes. Eyes of anger, like his stare could kill me. I looked to the floor so I didn't havta stare into his eyes so much.

"...What are we in this school?" he asked.

I didn't understand the question, so I replied with s imsple answer, "We're students...?

He scoffed a bit, "I meant our relationship."

I could tell he was getting impatient, so I answered honestly.

"We're frien-" I tried to respond.

"NO!" he interrupted.

I jumped from his scream.

"We are not friends! We are lovers! But you're not acting like we are together!"

"Thats because we're not together. We never were!"

I didn't understand his sudden outburst of anger and desperation. It's like, all these years, he's been still trying and I never even noticed.

"I don't loooooove you anymore!" I stuck out my tongue.

I think I set something off that day, because as soon as I gave him attitude, he immediately jumped me and pinned me against the concrete. I think my head might of hit the floor because my head was killing me for a while.

"How dare you talk to me like that! My own girlfriend should be loyal to her own boyfriend like a good girl."

He took one of my boobs and squeezed little by little until I screamed from pain. He slapped me while I was screaming.

"SHUT UP DUMB BITCH! Do you want the whole school to hear your whorish noises?!"

He slapped me some more on my cheeks until I started to cry. I was afraid of telling him to stop because he might of hit me some more. He held onto my hair and attempted to lift me up, but I was having trouble moving.

"Fine. I'll leave you here then. But don't tell anyone about what happened here. I will hurt you so much worse than this!"

I nodded and then he moved the cinder block and left. After I knew he was gone, I started to sob hard. My breathing wasn't in beat, my heart was racing fast and my eyes and nose were leaking. I could tell my hair was a mess as well when I saw my shadow.

I couldn't believe that Tadase-kun has become such a beast. He was a totally different person. I was scared to even see him anymore. I didn't want this. I wanted to leave, go home and never leave.

I was praying for Ikuto... I wanted him to come back and take me away again... I missed his teasing. I missed seeing his smirk that usually pisses me off, but in a good way.

I pulled out my little mirror that was in my pocket. As I looked through it, I could see the leftover slap marks all over my cheeks. Maybe some scratch marks as well, but not so bad. I fixed up my hair and applied a little "cover up" make up I had in my pocket as well. I don't usually have a purse, I usually keep things in my pockets.

I looked at my watch.

"Shit! Ten before class? I haven't eaten yet!"

I wasn't sure how I was gonna be able to eat with a normal face. I felt scarred and I'm pretty sure Nagihiko woulda noticed-hell, everyone mighta noticed something was off with me. I just told myself to stay calm and act as much normal than usual. Though even myself didn't know how much normal I had...


	3. Chapter 3

It was wet outside. It smelled like fall was on its way to drown me in the amount of sorrow I was already drowning in. Everyday started feeling the same; I didn't wanna leave home only to show up to school as Tadase-kun's girlfriend who is secretly on a leash.

Every time we were around other students, he would act like his old self, but with more confidence and get all lovey-dovey with me. But when we were alone, he would hit me every time I made a mistake or something, and he would make sure to hit me where no one would see it.

What's harder, is that I can't talk to anyone about this. I put on a fake smile every time someone talks to me or look concerned about why I look like I was hit by a truck or something. I can't fool Nagihiko or Rima.

They knew something was up and they've asked countless times, but I would act like nothing was wrong and come up with an excuse. I got in trouble with Tadase-kun so many times because Nagihiko and Rima asked him about my behavior. He would beat me and yell at me saying to try harder not to look like I was in pain.

I couldn't really help it with all this pain he already gave me to begin with. It's basically an endless cycle of pain. I swear, the next time I saw Kukai, I would hurt him just as hard as Tadase-kun has since he gave him those stupid pills to make Tadase-kun act this way...

It had been about a month since this whole thing started. The school festival was going to start soon. Our class has already made the decision of having a Punk/Rock cafe. Which was great because I was growing up with that kind of clothing.

And I heard Tadase-kun's class was going to be a cosplay cafe, which means only the girls would be the servers and the boys will be the chefs. Also meaning that I wouldn't see him too much during the festival!

Recently, like since after summer vacation, we had gotten a new subject class in our school and with it, and new club. It was music class and we had recently gotten a new teacher who was willing to partake in this new subject for the school. Nobody knew about the new teacher, only that he was really talented when it comes to music.

I wasn't that excited for it since I didn't know how to play any instruments and this was another way to make myself look even more stupid.I had a bad experience in art class a while ago, but luckily, it was only a trial to see if any student wanted to have art courses. I thought it was the same with music class. So I had to bare with it and then quickly make my decision to decline music as an extra course when asked.

It was a small break before music class was gonna begin and Nagihiko and Rima came up to me in class.

"So Amu, are you gonna join music class as an extra course?" Nagihiko asked.

"Not a chance," I smirked, "there's no way I can play an instrument without embarrassing myself."

Rima laughed, "Figures. You never really did have talent."

I pouted.

"Now, now Rima-chan, it's not her fault that she doesn't know her potential yet." he chuckled a little.

"Hey!" I flapped a arms and blushed.

They both laughed hard. After a while, I laughed as well. I realized that they were trying to make me feel better. I was pretty sure they knew about Tadase-kun and I. But it was nice. I couldn't remember the last time I laughed so much that it hurt. It was nice.

"Thank you..." I said with a reassuring smile.

They looked at me confused, but then they understood and smiled with me.

It was time for music class. Everyone in my class was escorted by our teacher down to the Art's Department of the school, to an unknown classroom. When we walked into the class, it was filled with newly polished instruments. There were many trumpets, flutes, and grand piano and a bunch of other instruments. It was a big class, big enough that it almost looked like a smaller version of an orchestra room.

There were many rows of seats with black stands which I believed held the note sheets for people who played the instruments. It felt warm here, the atmosphere felt like it was welcoming me with open arms. I liked that feeling, just not the subject. Everyone was in awe and admired the room just like I was.

Everyone picked out their seats. I sat in the back with Nagihiko and Rima so that I wouldn't be noticed so much by the teacher. Though, me being the only person with pink hair is totally not noticeable...

Our new teacher arrived and our class teacher introduced him before she left. Our new teacher walked in. He had shoulder-length, dark blue hair. He was wearing glasses, and wearing a white shirt that was buttoned up but enough to see the top part of his muscles. Sleeves rolled up over his elbows, and baggy, yet fitted jeans. My eyes blinked twice at the familiar posture from that person.

"Everyone, this will be your music teacher, Tsukiyomi Ikuto-sensei. Please be kind to him during this class." our teacher said, then left.

All the girls in the class squeed in excitement and saying how hot he looked, except for me and Rima. Nagihiko, Rima and I knew who he was, and I felt like I was gonna cry...

"...Ikuto..." I whispered as I stared at his face.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

"Hello everyone. As you know, I'm Tsukiyomi Ikuto. You may call me Yomi-sensei since my name is a mouthful." He spoke.

The class laughed.

"Now then, let me explain how this course will be..."

Time didn't seem to flow properly during class, at least, that's what it felt like to me. I sat there staring at him. I wanted to look away, but I couldn't. Ikuto was right there, and I still couldn't reach him. I wanted to say something, do something. But all I really wanted to do was cry where I sat. I didn't think I missed him that much. I wanted to hit him for not staying in contact with and for being away for so long...

I was hoping to wait by the end of class, but it was taking to long and I was ready to blow up any second. I could feel Nagihiko and Rima's hands on my shoulders, making sure that I was alright. They didn't know that I actually liked Ikuto, but I think they could tell the whole time.

"Do you wanna leave Amu?" Rima whispered.

I nodded. I didn't wanna leave yet. I needed to talk to him first. I think they understood my feelings.

The bell finally went after what felt like years to me, and everyone got up from their seats to leave. Though, most of the girls stayed behind to gawk at Ikuto and talk to him. It was gonna be difficult to get close to him.

"I'm sorry girls, but I have things to tend to. I will talk to you another time." He said.

The girls awed and started leaving the class. I decided to blend in with them to leave since there was no way of getting close.

"Hinamori-san, is it?" He called out.

I stopped.

"Stay. I need a word with you."

I could feel Nagihiko and Rima's hands on my shoulders, like they were gonna back me up or something.

"It's okay. I'll be fine..." I smiled to them.

They nodded and left. Ikuto closed the classroom door and sighed.

"You know, it's difficult to teach with you staring at me the whole time." He said smirking.

I guess I was at my limit. I couldn't hold back anymore. I let the tears come out. I sobbed and sobbed. I could feel his arms wrap around me.

"I guess you were that lonely without me..." He said.

"You idiot... Why haven't you been keeping contact with me?! I haven't heard or seen you in a long time!"

He brought me even closer, he smelled so good and he was warm.

"Do you have any idea how much using my phone from other countries cost? I bet you got a huge bill too. Plus, I was busy and couldn't come back easily."

I continued to cry and sob.

"That's why I took the opportunity to become a teacher here, to become a professional musician and to see you again."

"Really...? *sniff*"

"Really... I missed you as well."

I was happy. Happy that he wasn't with someone else. Happy hat he hasn't forgotten me, and happy that he came to see me. I didn't want to leave. I wanted to stay in his embrace forever and never see Tadase-kun again.

Though thinking of Tadase-kun at that moment made me feel queasy.

I looked at while wiping off my tears.

"Is there anyway I could stay here during lunch break?" I asked bluntly.

He nodded. "Unfortunately I can't. I have a lunch meeting with the other staff. I guess a welcome party or something."

"Oh..." I really didn't wanna leave his side.

He smiled and missed my forehead. "Don't worry, you can hide out with me next time."

I blushed from his sudden kiss. He laughed a little.

"I missed seeing you blush..." He said.

I felt embarrassed, but I was happy that he wanted to see me. I could only hope that things would get better from then on out.

How stupid it was of me to believe that...

Tadase-kun found me too easily this time. It was probably my fault for spacing out about Ikuto since I left class. He pulled me around the corner to a location where less students were around and started yelling at me. He pulled my hair a little and pulled me close. He forced a kiss on me like the many times he did roughly, biting my lips and tongue.

"Where have you been? You were 5 minutes late meeting me for lunch!" He clenched his hands around my wrists.

"...I'm sorry... I got caught up in class... The teacher wanted me to stay behind to talk to me..." I had tears running down.

"LIES!" He slapped me again. And again and again.

I tried to block my face from his slaps but then moved on to another place on my body to hit until he suddenly stopped.

"Someone's coming. You better clean up before you go back to class." He then left like nothing happened.

I stood there for a moment to breathe and started walking like nothing was wrong. I was about to go into the bathroom, when I suddenly feel someone's hand on my sore shoulder. I flinch a little due the pain and turn to see who it is.

"...Ikuto...?!"

"Amu...? Your face... What happened to you?" He asked, concerned.

"Oh... You know... I fell... Down the stairs..." I wanted to tell him the truth, but I didn't want Tadase-kun to find out. So I lied.

"...Maybe I should take you to the nurse? In case you didn't hit your head."

"Oh no! Its fine! This happens all the time! I'm really clumsy, remember?" I bonk my head lightly and make a cute smile like a moe klutz.

"Huh... True... Still..." He persisted.

"I'm really fine... Trust me..." I give me a fake smile. An SOS smile. I would only hope he understands and helps me when the time comes.

"Well... Okay... But to be sure, I want you to have this." He hands me a piece of paper. "It's my new number. I want you to call me if you ever need me."

I nodded. "I will, promise..."

I was happy to have Ikuto back in my life. I didn't know how long I would have to live like I have for the past month or so. It was like something or someone giving me a gift of relief. But I knew then that Tadase-kun wouldn't stop. If he found out about Ikuto, he would surely come looking for me and making sure I don't go near him, like in the beginning of when we all met. But it was different now, it's not out of protection, it's competition. Before Ikuto left, they made a competition to see who can have me. Tadase-kun had me, but Ikuto didn't know yet. I didn't wanna tell him. I wanted Ikuto, he wanted me, and Tadase-kun wanted a trophy girlfriend. That I didn't want.

Ikuto patted me on the head like a pet.

"Also..." he started, "...try not to call me Ikuto in school. Yomi-sensei is what you call me here, okay?"

I nodded. I understood because we were never allowed to call teachers by their first name, and if people found out I called him Ikuto, they would think something's up.

"Go on now, get better soon." he pushed me slightly.

"Wait... Will I see you again soon?" I asked desperately.

A small pause. "What's this? You're gonna miss me?" he said in a sly voice.

I blushed. He laughed.

"I really do miss teasing you... So far, I will be busy. But if you want..." he took out a form, "...you can join my class and be there everyday. Plus, extra classes for when you're... not doing so well..." he smiled.

I knew he meant I had no real talent, but if that's what it was gonna take to see him, then it didn't matter to me. I signed it, confirming that I will have Music class as my extra curriculum class.

"Try... not to laugh... I know I suck..." I said.

He smiled. "No promises."

I pouted. But I felt happy that I would be seeing him more often than what I was use to. The only hope I had then, was to make sure Tadase-kun doesn't join music class as well. He would find out about Ikuto soon enough, but making sure he doesn't join that class might be more difficult.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Ikuto didn't know that I was Tadase-kun's "girlfriend" and how much he became an abusive jerk, and I wanted it to stay that way, at least, until I graduate. I was sure that if Ikuto found out that I was going through hell, he would either tell Tadase-kun off or beat him up. I didn't want either of that, because I know that I was gonna be targeted afterwards.

I knew that once I finished High School, I was home free. We were already planning on taking different Colleges in the future, since we wanted different futures for ourselves. But knowing Tadase-kun these days, I was pretty sure he could find a way to keep me to satisfy himself. I just wanted to leave entirely, but I couldn't, I wanted a future without him. If it means to be hurt for another 6 months, then I didn't care.

"Hinamori Amu-san, right?"

"Y-yes."

"There you go, you can go back to class now and give this note to your teacher."

I was at the nurses office tending to the little "fall" I had before and it was already 10 minutes passed the next period. She made me a doctors note for the inconvenience of me being late.

"Thank you Sensei!" I bowed my head a left.

I started walking back to class and started to think about how I was gonna keep my relationship a secret from Ikuto. I knew it would be difficult, but I couldn't see any other option to keep myself safe enough from Tadase-kun. But I was pretty sure that when he would see Ikuto, it might agitate him even more as well...

I suddenly turned a corner and bumped into someone.

"Gah...!" I started to fall backwards.

I stopped. It felt like I was being held from my back. I opened my eyes and noticed that it was Ikuto again. I flinched and brought myself back on my feet.

"You should be more careful Amu. Or do you love the floor that much?" He smiled a little.

"Hmph! I just wasn't paying attention to where I was going. I'm sorry." I looked away.

"Heh, it's fine. I was actually looking for you."

"Huh...?" My heart started beating faster again.

"I wanted to make sure you were still alright from before. It seems like you are, so that's good."

(Was he that concerned about me...?) I smiled.

"...Also..." He sounded more tense now, "...Can we...? Uh... Never mind. This isn't the best time anyway... You need to get to class now. I'll tell you later." He patted me on my head and walked away.

I wasn't sure what he wanted to say... But it made my heart beat way faster than normal. It made me feel nervous.

After school came and everyone was either leaving or going to their club activities. I usually left home with Tadase-kun since he forces me to, but... he wasn't at the shoe lockers by the front entrance. I suddenly got a text from him.

- Something came up. Go home now before it gets dark. I'll see you in the morning. -

And just like that, I jumped for joy of having some freedom going home that day. It had been a long time since I was able to breathe and be myself on my way home.

A tap on my shoulder. I thought maybe it was Tadase-kun tricking me and noticing my happiness due to his after school absence. I tensed up a bit.

"Amu?"

It wasn't him. I turned my head.

"Ikuto?" I sighed in relief. " I thought you were someone else..."

He looked confused. "I'm guessing someone you didn't wanna see?"

(Ack... He noticed!)

"...Erm... Anyway! What's up?" I tried to change the subject.

"You going home?" He finally asked.

"Yeah?"

"Alone?" He grinned.

"Y-Yes...?" I got nervous...

"Well that's not good, a little girl such as yourself shouldn't walk home alone."

"H-hey! I grew a little you know!"

"Barely, you still look the same to me." He stuck his tongue out.

"Hmph! What are you a kid?" I started to walk away to go home.

"Hey wait! I was kidding! You definitely changed a bit since the last time I saw you."

"Liar."

"I'm not lying. In fact..." He started speaking softly that I barely heard what he said, "...you look really good..."

"Huh?"

"Nothing." He chuckled a bit.

Our walk home was interesting. It had been so long since we had spent time together, like actually friends. The last time I saw him was when he took me out to the amusement park that night, when he said his goodbyes. I didn't know how to act around him. It felt like we were back to square one in "getting-to-know-each-other" again. I was pretty sure that he didn't change at all and it wouldn't take him long to be back to the way he was before.

I kept thinking about how I can go on like this at school now that he was there, with Tadase-kun being the way that he was. It scared me, and I wasn't sure how I could hide it from him.

"Amu?"

"Huh?"

"You seem quiet. Is something wrong?" Ikuto asked.

I was so deep into thought that I forgot I was still here with Ikuto. I didn't wanna concern him with my problems, so I had to come up with something.

"It's nothing! Just my head still hurts..." It was kinda true since it did.

He stopped walking and held my arm to stop. I turned my head wondering what he wanted. His head was down, so I couldn't see his face. That made me worry, because many he knew something was wrong.

He pulled me closer to him, with my head placed onto his chest. He was hugging me gently. He placed his other hand on my head and rubbed it. At this point, I was blushing 20 shades of red from his affection.

"Poor Amu. Even now, you're this clumsy. I thought you grew up?" he chuckled.

"Sh-Shut up! If you're done teasing me, then let me go!" I tried to push him away.

But he held me tight and kissed my head where the bump was. He let go after that and smiled.

"There you go. You look better already."

I blushed even more and he laughed.

"You'll never change." he said.

"S-Same to you!" I turned around and started walking.

After a while a walking, I finally made it home. Ikuto told me after he dropped me off that he only lives down the road from me. He offered to walk with me to school.

"Wouldn't that be a bad idea? I mean, if people saw us everyday walking together, they might think something is up."

He nodded. "Good point."

That _was_ one of the issues. The other was Tadase-kun seeing me with him, since he does wait for me every morning by the gate entrance. I know Tadase-kun will overreact and later beat me to a pulp. I didn't want that, and I didn't want Ikuto to get hurt either. So I played it safe.

"Good night Ikuto." I smiled.

"Good night Amu. See you tomorrow." he winked.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

After I got back home from walking with Ikuto, I went straight to bed. I felt so bubbly inside that Ikuto was treating like he use to, or at least, more than he use to. I haven't felt this way in a long time, and I didn't want it to go away. I kept hoping that I have multiple dreams about him once I start to sleep, happy dreams, calm dreams... Even... the nasty stuff... I would start to blush when that thought would even come up, and stuff my face into my pillow and would start rolling around on my bed until I would fall off.

But then, I would think about if Ikuto really did had feelings for me, or maybe it was just another set of teasing. I would always look back on the day he kissed my cheek, those long years ago. I believed that it was real, so I had to hold onto that, and not give up yet on my life. I only had to go through the second semester until graduation.

bzzzz bzzzz

I jumped a little from the sudden vibrating sound of my phone. I picked it up and saw that I received a text. It was Tadase-kun.

**"Come to my place right now. No excuses."**

I gulped. What did he want from me? It was a stupid question. I knew what he wanted. He wanted to use me for his anger-his rage, for whatever is going on in his head. I didn't wanna go, but I was sure he was gonna beat me to death when we see each other at school the next day. But then again, he might be beating me when I get to his place anyway. But then I thought, if I go now, the bruises wouldn't be so fresh the next day. I felt sick thinking how prepared I was for it...

I replied to Tadase-kun's demand and started walking downstairs to leave. My mother stopped me before I opened the door.

"Amu-chan? Where are you going?" she asked.

_Oh just going to Tadase-kun's house to get violated and abused by the boy you call my boyfriend who you love and adore because he's so cute and nice. _Of course, I couldn't say that to her. Not yet anyway.

"Just going over to Tadase-kun's to study. I might be sleeping over again. WOuld that be okay?" I actually said.

"That's fine dear. Please be careful this time getting there. I don't want you to fall down again and get more bruises."

"...Ah.. Yes mom..." Yeah, _that_ was my excuse to my mother... Sad, no?

I wanted to take the long way to Tadase-kun's house, but I was sure that he would scold and hit me for taking too long. Honestly... I never get a break... But when I finally made it to Tadase-kun's place, I noticed that his parents were home and still awake. They greeted me the same way they always do, with smiles.

"Where's Tadase-kun?" I asked while looking around.

"In his room, would you like some tea?" his mother asked.

I shook my head. "No thanks. We won't be up too long studying. I'm sure the tea might keep us up."

"Ah yes, that's true. Have a good night then."

"You too." I bowed my head and left to his room.

I got to his room and mentioned my presence outside of his door. No response. I opened the door, he wasn't there. It was strange not finding him in his room, but I noticed a note of his desk.

**"In the bath, come take one with me."**

My eyes widened... The thought of taking a bath with him, it just sounded embarrassing... And maybe a little gross... But once again, I had no choice. So I went with it. I opened the door to the bathroom.

"Amu-chan?"

"Y-Yeah... It's me." I responded.

"Good. Get in it." he demanded.

He didn't sound mad at all. More like desperate. I was hesitant to take off all my clothes, but I took them off slowly, one by one. Then I took a towel and wrapped it around myself to cover my... parts... Then opened the door that led into the bath. Tadase-kun was resting in the bath, legs far apart, arms rested on the edge of the bath and his head held back with a towel on his forehead. His eyes were closed, and he was breathing slowly. He looked so peaceful. I never woulda thought of seeing him like that, even before he started being aggressive towards me. It was like a small dream. I noticed he opened one eye and looked over to me.

"Shouldn't you be washing yourself?" he said in a snobbish tone.

"Y-Yeah... Sorry."

I sat down on the shower chair, and moved the towel in front of me so he didn't see my reflected...parts. I started to wash my hair, when I then heard him getting out of the bath. I continued a little bit, trying to ignore him, but he placed his hands on my shoulders. I twitched a little. He kneed behind me and starting tracing my back. He sighed.

"It must hurt." he said bluntly.

"Huh?" I stopped washing my hair.

"The bruises." he explained.

I sat there in awkwardness. Then he took the showerhead and rinsed the shampoo out of my hair. He had his fingers into my hair, brushing it, massaging it, it felt so good, I felt turned on. But I snapped out of it and took the showerhead.

"I-It's fine. I can do it myself...!" I squeaked.

He was silent. He continued by taking the soap and rubbing it against my back. It hurt a little when he rubbed the areas where my bruises were. But he was trying his best not to be so rough. I could feel his fingers moving into places that tickled me a little, and then lead to... other places. He was rubbing the soap against my breasts, gently massaging them, all around. He rubbed my arms slowly, up and down. My stomach, side to side. Then made his way around my thighs and slowly towards my...

"Ah...!" I closed my legs on reflex.

He pulled his hands back a little. He rested his head on my shoulder and had his chest pressed against my back. I could feel his... penis poking at the bottom of my back. It felt soft, but hard, and it was warm against my cold skin. He sighed again, whispering in my ear.

"Please... Lemme just..." he pleaded.

He continued to try to touch me, down there. I was blushing like crazy and my hands were blocking where he wanted to go. He whispered softly again.

"Amu-chan... Lemme touch you..."

I was being surprisingly...sweet. Being romantic, in a way. His voice was reaching inside of me. It was turning me on way too easily. It reminded me how Ikuto use to be with me. How he would touch me, and talk to me... I understood then that I wasn't being turned on by Tadase-kun's pleas, I was thinking about how Ikuto once was like this to me. Reminding me. So I somehow, opened myself to Tadase-kun, while thinking it was Ikuto. Or at least, I was hoping that Ikuto would do this to me one day. I was so turned on, I wasn't thinking anymore. My instincts just went wild and just let myself go.

Tadase-kun found his way back down to my sensitive part, and began to rub it gently. I let out a small moan and covered my mouth quickly before anyone else heard me. One of his hands started to touch one of my breasts while the other hand continued to play with me. He squeezed my nipple which let out another small moan. He played and played with me until I couldn't hold it back anymore. I gave away a huge moan that was covered up in my hands. After a pause, he hugged me and asked...

"Hey... Can... I put it in...?"

I nodded, without hesitation. Remember, I was still only thinking of Ikuto doing this to me, so of course, I wouldn't hesitate. So Tadase-kun had me bend over on my knees, with my hands on the edge of the bath, and my head was rested onto the edge as well. He was standing on his knees as well and came closer to me. I could feel his penis press against my vagina. He was trying to place it in, and he finally made it in. After that, it was all blank. The last thing I remember was sitting in the bath with him, cuddling.

I didn't remember anything. Not a thing. In a way, I was glad. Glad, for one, that I didn't remember, and two, that for once in a long time, that he was... nice to me. I was kinda happy. For a long time, in the past, I wanted to have a real relationship with him, but things with Ikuto, and everything else, drove me away from Tadase-kun. I can understand that he might have felt hurt that I gave up on him. After trying so hard for him to like the real me, he ends up falling for me, and then I decide to go for Ikuto instead. I just wish he didn't turn out like this, because he was desperate.

I wanted to apologize to him about everything. But I could never bring myself to say anything, anymore. I thought maybe I could just tell him after we graduate, then at least I could be safe that way, just in case.

The next morning, we walked together in silence. I believed he was back to being his aggressive self, but, as it turns out, he was actually shy about last night. So was I. And when we got close to our school, he held my hand. We haven't held hands in a while, so it was nice. This warm side of him is what I missed. It was a part of him that I thought he threw away. But I guess he didn't.

I could see the school gates by then. And I also saw a figure, leaning against the gates. A tall figure, almost recognizable. I looked over to Tadase-kun, and his face turned from sweet, into rage. I knew then, who that figure was. And it was the start of a war that was gonna happen in my life. A war I fear that will tear me apart before graduation...

"Ikuto-nii-san?!" Tadase-kun yelled.


End file.
